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Location: Outbreak, Recovery, Cover Up
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| Started By | Thread Subject | Replies | Last Post | |||
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| 13th.Casualty | Comments, Suggestions, Criticisms | 15 | Oct 12 2008, 11:35 PM EDT by 13th.Casualty | |||
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Thread started: Jun 27 2008, 7:07 PM EDT
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I will gladly accept any comments, suggestions, or criticisms.
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| residentmagnum | Nice start | 3 | Jul 8 2008, 12:28 AM EDT by 13th.Casualty | |||
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Thread started: Jul 4 2008, 2:49 AM EDT
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This is going to be a great online book
I like the flash back maybe every now and then something could happen with the police who raided the place or maybe a dead or undead soldier come out of a secret passage Just me thinking outloud 1 mixed race guy=the boss 2 the frightened girl becomes a bombshell=Janet Morgan's 3 comic relief= any race 4 hard ass white guy 5 maybe a prisoner who helps out and maybe not a bad guy after all I like it and it is your book, but if you like my sugestions give me a reply
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| Shrody | *Clap clap clap clap* | 5 | Jul 6 2008, 12:28 AM EDT by Mr.Xeight | |||
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Thread started: Jul 1 2008, 10:59 AM EDT
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Very nice writing, i enjoyed the style and sometimes subtle humor. the only criticism i have is the few juvenile comments like "duuuude" and "look emo." SWAT teams don't generally announce their presence before entering a room, they are a last resort to a dangerous situation. And "duuuude" doesn't really fit the regular SWAT member. but don't get me wrong those are friendly criticisms. NICE WORK! you would get an A in my class... if i had a class.... or a teaching degree....
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