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True Story: Hometown Disaster
One night while coming home from work, I had stopped at a red light and noticed a funny looking man to my right walking down a side street. Curiosity geared and ready to go, I watched him through what I'm sure was more light changes than any normal person has ever sat through. It was midnight, I was fortunately the only one on the road, good thing. I knew that I did not want to attract his attention. His clothes were tattered and he looked a little scuffed up. Deciding to follow him on a strong suspicion that he might be indeed one of the undead, I turned down the street. Slowly I crept up behind him, lights off, keeping like 10 feet between us. I also scooted down in my seat so that I could see him but if he had turned around he'd see an empty car. Mitsubishi makes a really quiet engine and I'm thankful. So back to the man, he was stumbling around now. Falling into yards, crawling back into the street, getting up and shuffling over to the gutter on the other side. He knocked over a few trashcans left out, swung at a mailbox and ripped up all the mail that came fluttering after him. This cat that had been walking down the side of the street, stopped. It hissed at him and did this backward curl thing, so that it was bunched up. He dove at the cat and was huddling around it and I kept seeing him clawing at the poor thing. It scratched him and was able to get away. As it scampered off, I couldn't help but wonder if this was a true zombie. Noises outside caught my attention, "Carlos, do you know what time it is?" I assumed she knew the man. He was moaning, again not a good sign. I noticed she had a bat in her hand, at least she was armed. He stumbled her way, reaching out towards her and WHAM!!!! She cracked him right across the head. "Carlos, I told you not to come home drunk again. Tonight you sleep on the lawn." After she went in the house, I had to see for myself. So I grabbed the led pipe out from under my seat, thinking just in case. Creeping isn't something I would normally do, but I felt that this being a possible ZED situation, it was best to be careful. I crept over and I heard more moaning coming from the possible zombie. I stopped and put into my head the best logic I had. Thought one being that if it truly is a zombie, then maybe if I get him before he's able to contaminate anyone else I'll be able to contain the problem. Thought number two, If this truly was Carlos and he were just drunk, I'd be able to smell the booze. Thought number three, what if he is drunk and he is also a zombie? Okay that one had me stumped, but I decided that it was best for humanity if I found out first. (which I am sure would only happen in this scenario) So putting my best foot forward, I leaned a little closer at still a good 3ft away. Factoring in zombie/drunk = slow reflex and bad coordination. I said, "Carlos?" He then opened his eyes really wide and raised a hand up. I jumped back and into a batting stance. He was mumbling and I was able to make out words.. I realized he was speaking Spanish. With that out of the way and my nerves back, I got in my car and went home.
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