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Looking for advice and critisism for my first piece...
I posted this up months ago but never got any feed back. I'm tempted to post it on an actual Creative Writing forum, but I would prefer if the minds of this site were to give me the first round of feed back.
Much appreciated.
SGT. G
P.S Appologies for the spelling error on the title page...
Posted:
Jan 29 2013, 6:44 PM EST by SGTGerman
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 EDC
Prepare for anything
Added:
Sep 6 2012, 10:53 PM EDT by
Last updated:
Sep 6 2012, 10:54 PM EDT by
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SGTGerman's Creative Writing
ESP COMMANDO Gladiators Prologue 2433 Conference Room 2F The War Room “Gentlemen please!” the Chancellor snapped causing the bickering rivals to fall silent for a brief second. Their voices had quickly risen from talking volum
Last updated:
Jan 29 2013, 6:44 PM EST by
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amazing
i liked this stroy a lot! i think u should make sequal! i really think u wrote it well.
Posted:
Nov 18 2011, 10:57 PM EST by
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Survival fiction
A few places where you can down load some books and stories for the holidays
First an illustrated Zombie novel
http://www.sixnovel.com/main.html
SHTF novels (2)
http://overtactions.blogspot.com/
Board with links to PAW fiction short stories and novels
http://pawfiction.proboards.com/
An assortment of PAW fiction by one person
http://www.jerrydyoung.com/news.php
Enjoy.
Posted:
Nov 11 2011, 5:22 PM EST by
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Tax Payers
No one told you to go their. So suck it up. My taxes are payen 4 you to be up their? I got Julie Wonder on Wlos news 13 SHEVILLE, NC...HOLE TEAM IS A ****** JOKE wLOS
Posted:
Nov 11 2011, 4:27 PM EST by
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Station 5
SETI Arctic Research Program; Station 5. (I'd like to dedicate this to "John 'Taxes'" (see thread below entitled "Tax Payers" and his enlightening comment that was completely relevant to my story.) Chapter One: A Day in the Life S
Last updated:
Jun 6 2012, 8:58 PM EDT by
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On Grammar
I'd just like to point out that the majority of people on the internet use "your" for "you're" and vice versa, and it's really starting to annoy.
Also, it's better to learn grammar and turn your grammar check off on microsoft word, because it will often advise you incorrectly.
Also, if you're wondering why it matters (which was addressed in the page to a satisfactory degree, I think), it's because people won't listen to your actual point if they beleive you to be less intelegent. It makes reading and understanding difficult as well as making you look steroetypical.
This page is very informative and well done. I congratulate its author.
Also, "its" means belonging to "it," while "it's" is a contraction meaning "it is."
Just my notes on the subject.
Posted:
Nov 6 2011, 9:21 AM EST by
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Trolling for Zombies
Good, but kinda confusing and WHERE ARE THE BLEEPING ZOMBIES!?
Posted:
Jul 11 2011, 8:39 AM EDT by
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book
wow u rly need to make some more chapters i rly love these stories
Posted:
Jul 6 2011, 2:09 PM EDT by
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B.O.B food - enough for 72 hours? Really?
It seems to me that most "preppers" have caught on to the idea of having enough food and water in ones bag for 3 days, or 72 hours.
If I'm not mistaken, this is taken from the US Air Force's Bail Out Bags for when pilots were waiting to be rescued, possibly in enemy territory. I can understand the thinking behind pilots having a time limit, but in the event of social collapse (I don't believe in zombies-yet), why only take 3 days worth of food? Am I right in thinking that most people on this site seem to go with that?
I can understand if the intention is to go somewhere in particular where there are at least high chances of more food, but not the whole "escape into the woods with 3 days worth of food and then live of the land or barter" kinda thing.
I live in a suburb surrounded by lots and lots of countryside. The countryside is all connected and goes out for dozens of miles that i personally know of. There are also probably close to half a million people within a 30 mile radius of my house.
Whilst the woods and fields may have lots of furry creatures in, it aint exactly the land of milk and honey.
Here's my BOB, with plenty of food in. Not that I intend to leave my own home:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTe2pUfsP6w
Posted:
May 31 2011, 2:59 PM EDT by
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Marvel Universe Zombies
I was at Barns and Nobles, looking through the magmas when I found Marvel Universe Zombies. It's a manga where the Marvel heroes get infected and become zombies. They have all of their powers and knowledge but are driven to fulfil the hunger. It includes the Hulk, Fantastic Four, Spider man, iron man and others.
There are five in the series so far. I have read the first three so far. If you get a chance take a peek at them, they will entertain you for a while. Plus the total idea of all of these superheroes being zombies with unquenchable hunger, to the point that they end up eating almost every living thing in the universe is just a scary new level of zombies.
Posted:
May 13 2011, 1:18 PM EDT by
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AWESOME!!!!
You should definitely write a book based on this story......this was AMAZING.
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Zombie Fiction story Zombie Contingency: Chapter 1 Part 1
Zombie Contingency
Chapter 1
In the Beginning
The plan to drill into the earths mantle was touted in some small circles as a triumph of technology and human will. In 2013 that plan was put into action and humanity embarked on what was to be a new era of exploration and scientific understanding. Never before had anyone on the planet been able to reach the depths of the earth’s core and this, it turned out, had been for the best.
At first this great accomplishment went unnoticed by the public. Geology after all is not on the forefront of a the worlds mind when there are wars in the Middle East, UFC championships on TV and people still debating evolution all over the world. Still the drill spun down, grinding, tearing, and burning deeper into the very flesh of the planet, unearthing new minerals, metals, and elements.
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Zombie Fiction Story, based on HumanRoach's Idea.
Ok, first off, the story is based on an idea humanroach had, and asked others to write, and it is still a work in progress. But here is what I have.
The Beginning.
Mark sat staring at the television, more news about the super flu that had hitten the world by surprise. He smirked at the sight, remembering that only months ago, him and his team had developed this flu, and its more lethal brother, that had yet to be released. The planet was about to be reborn, in a less poluted form. He turned towards the trucks that were being loaded with the second virus, a few weeks after the super flu had worked its wonder, his group had announced their creation of a "vaccine", so far, their plan was working perfectly, these trucks were shipping to several important military and political locations across the continent. and he trusted the others to take care of Europe, Asia, and the rest of the planet. He walked slowly towards his own vehicle, he had an apocalypse to prepare.
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flame throwers
The biggest problem, with flame throwers, is they are long obsulete, and so is the fuel. You might create a flame thrower, but i suspect it would be more dangerous to the user, than the target. The best bet would be something mounted in the back of a pick up truck.
Good luck on Z day
Posted:
Apr 5 2011, 4:16 PM EDT by
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Weapons (Marsden's Flash Fiction)
Here will detail the weaponry you can choose for your character in the Zombie Flash Fiction. Ranged Rifles Rifles are guns, most effective at mid-range. They are capable of taking care of small groups of zombies. M16 The M16 is the m
Last updated:
Feb 14 2011, 4:19 PM EST by
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Trolling for Zombies
This is just an idea that Rocketman52, Pro, and myself have been messing around with. A short story took on a life of it's own, and seems that it could end up potentially endless. We have decided to try something new with it, nad are going to break i
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Feb 10 2011, 10:19 PM EST by
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Flash Fiction New Weapon Poll
Please take 5 seconds to vote for the weapon you would like to see in the game.
The poll can be found on this page.
http://www.zombiesurvivalwiki.com/page/Marsden%27s+Short+Combat+Stories
I reccomend you use research Wikipedia to check weapon's rate of fire etc. before you vote, just so you know what you are voting for.
Enjoy!
The weapon with the highest % of votes by Monday 14th will be added to the game for people to choose.
Posted:
Feb 10 2011, 4:44 PM EST by
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Marsden's Short Combat Stories
For those of you who love the action without too much plot: I dedicate this is to you. These short works of fiction are experiments for me to try to improve my writing technique. Please comment, criticise and enjoy. These stories are all randomly g
Last updated:
Feb 14 2011, 11:41 AM EST by
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